Dressed in a bright orange cardigan this evening its hard to think that I could be missed in a large crowd. And yesterday in a bright red one and probably tomorrow in a bright blue one, you would think that my clothes would stand out. And they tend to. Although with this harvest season in the air, I guess orange could be worn more often. However I am not talking about my clothes. My clothes stand out on their own. It just seems sometimes like I am Violet in the Incredible and invisibly moving around the university campus I attend. I sometimes feel like if I did or didn’t say a word, no one would notice. This isn’t the first time I have felt this either and I am pretty sure it won’t be the last. I am a delicate soul and I hurt so much. I know I am deeply blessed with such an amazing life yet here I am-complaining. I actually hate complaining but I feel the need to vent and point out how human I am. I want to know if I am the only one who ever feels so invisible that no one cares. I can get hundreds of likes on a facebook post yet where are all those “friends”. Probably off living their lives and not thinking twice about me.
In high school I was too busy to care if people remembered me or not. I was so focused on my goal of getting to college that I was so narrow-minded towards school, clubs and sports. I was involved more than most students and was even voted by my fellow classmates as the girl “Most Likely to Succeed”. Thankfully I managed to meet some amazing people who I am still friends with today, unfortuantely we live states away. I feel blessed though, as we can go months without talking and then pick up the phone and start back where we left off. Its truly amazing.
So where am I today. I am sit alone as I type this in my studio apartment. I feel lost, alone and invisible.