Lately my heart and mind have been in another place and I have been struggling. I try to keep things very transparent on my blog because I am not ashamed and I am pretty sure I am not the only one who goes through these types of situations.
I used to care so much about what everyone else thought about me. I learned that is one of the worse ways to try and be happy. I used to think I had to be in a different place to be happy. I used to think it mattered what I wore or if I had makeup on or not. I used to think I just needed to meet more people. I used to think if only I could do this, or be here, or “what-if” this and “what-if” that. That was back in the day when I was young and silly and didn’t have as much life experience. I have since then grown up a few years and changed my life around.
However, one thing still seems to stick around, I expect too much of others. Just because I would be willing to say “hi” to someone, doesn’t mean they are. I am slowly learning that I cannot and should not expect others to treat me the way I treat them. I cannot expect others to be kind, caring, compassionate, loving, nice, etc…. I just cannot.
My friend once told me that if you expect less, then you’ll be happy. At the time I expected so much of others that I just laughed at what I thought was a joke. All until February of this year and I was preparing to go to a conference. I had no idea what to expect and was nervously excited for that new experience. Then I went to the conference and it was amazing, wonderful and nothing like I could have imagined. I came home happy and changed because I didn’t have expectations. Same thing happened when I went to another conference in April and then when I went to Germany. There is something magical about not expecting or knowing what will happen. Then everything exceeds your expectations.
My problem is not when I am going to try new things, we see that I can succeed at not expecting anything out of those situations; but, rather when I am here at University and living in my day-to-day life. I get stuck in a rut of expecting too much of others. I am not even too sure how. Maybe the difference is that at conferences or studying abroad that is like vacation where as being at University that is just daily routine. That means everyone around you is busy and doing things with their life. And you are too, its just hard to notice. Especially when you go on facebook and see how they are living such an awesome life according to what they post. Are they really? Maybe, maybe not…you’ll never know unless you actually talk to them. Bottom line, invest time into people not things and expect less. Don’t expect anyone to text you, you might just have to text them. Don’t expect anyone to invite you to do something fun, you might have to invite them. Stop waiting for someone to impact your life, you should just go out and impact theirs!
Expect less. You’ll be happy.