It is frustrating when something in your life changes. Whether its the person who makes your coffee, the friendship that you hoped would turn into something more or the weatherman on tv. Change is hard. Life is hard. There are goods days and bad. I feel like I talk about that alot and am really good at preaching it on my personal good days. However the moment the storm rolls in, its like I hide and duck under the covers from my bad feelings. Its normal to feel hurt or pain when loss comes. If today just isn’t your day thats ok too. Not every day can we climb mountains, pass bills or catch the part we were aiming for. However its how you act during these times. Do you sulk, cry, become mute? For me, I feel like a mess has washed over me. Its during these times that sometimes just a long hot shower can help me to somewhat refocus. I’m not perfect and I will struggle the rest of the day but thats ok. Recently a friend told me, “its ok to be delicate”. I guess I like to put up a strong front, like everything is fine. The truth is, its not. Sometimes I wish things could be different. But, they’re not. On good days its easy to stay focused and faithful but its when I hit the bumps in the road that really slow me down. I may question G-d further, examine myself, tears may fall and all despair may come out at night. But in the evening when I finally go to bed, I often wake up the next morning even a slightest bit better. Its really easy for me to focus my thoughts on something which I don’t have now, even if its something I never had. I needed to write this post for no one. No one, but myself, because I know I needed a reminder that the Best is Yet to Come.
The truth is…if you’re out there and some how stumble upon this, I hope you realize you are not alone. Not everyday can be great. The valleys of days like today are what make the mountain top views that much more beautiful. I know everything will be ok. One day. and for you too!
All I have to say is today is Tuesday. Normally on Tuesdays I am a busy bee filled with tons of courses, homework, labs and serving the homeless. Tonight since on break, I have not done much. Ate dinner with the family. Tried* real hard to focus on homework but too lazy to really get anything done. Now here I am, back at the blog, writing about my life and how unproductive I am being. So here’s to a week of being unfocused…because some might say that all the rest of the time I am too focused!
This week I’m spending my time in a small American town. It’s cold and the sun is only out for approximately eight hours. I’m staying in a nice warm winter house that literally looks like something out of Pinterest. The weather calls for extra jackets, blankets, fire and hot chocolate! The town however looks like something out of a Hallmark film. With 2100 residents, one small main drag and many deer as neighbors. Yesterday everyone was out and about putting up their Christmas wreaths and lights. When we were driving back at night, the town was stunning! I felt like people could have broken out in song at any point in time or to see some romantic proposal out of a book. This thanksgiving week is really giving me change to perspective and showing me small town America.
I just want to shoot out a message to all my gal friends out there. Be strong enough and smart enough to save yourself from pain, misery and frustration. Something to think about during this holiday season. It will lead you one step closer to Mr. Wonderful.
Thursday is a Once in a Lifetime Experience!
This Thursday as the American World celebrates the nationalistic holiday of Thanksgiving. However for the first time since 1888 and the next time wont be for another 79000 years; Jews in America will celebrate Hannukkah alongside Thanksgiving. It shall be a wondrous and joyous occasion for all. The spirit of lighting up the world along with remembering how the pilgrims fought for a free land. In a sense Hannukkah and Thanksgiving line up nicely in historic terms. The Maccabees were fighting for freedom of religion. They were the underdog and they fought long and hard with much less supplies to overcome the Greek-Syrians. The fight for Independence from Britain was not much different. The pilgrims were fighting for freedom, in general. They were also the underdog and fought long and hard with much less than their opposition. In both cases, the underdog came out on top. They did what they had to. They did what was right. They placed their hope and trust in the Almighty G-d!
History tells what happened next….and today, thousands of years after the Maccabean Revolt and hundreds of years after the Plymouth colonists and Indians shared in a Harvest feast, we, American Jews will celebrate both. Together.
Something that has been playing on my mind on repeat recently is to do the right thing. You will end up alone. Tired. Cold. Crying. But in the long run you will be the one who comes out on top. Shining. Singing. Brilliant. and BOLD!
To do the right thing is far from easy, in fact, its often very hard. However it is in finding the strength and courage to stay true to who you are and what you believe that will keep you on the ground. Keep you moving forward. You will bend, break and snap in half along the way. But if you pick yourself back up and keep going, you will the race.
Doing things rights will take longer and be more frustrating but in the end, you can go to sleep knowing you did all you were capable of doing. You will have done right. You will have left nothing on the field.
So let’s together, go out there, and do whats right!
Traumatic Brain Injuries affect me everyday. The other day I had a massive migraine and could not seem to get rid of it. I finally was able to steady myself enough to get some advil in my system. I slowly ate some salty crackers and sipped on some water. I turned on a movie and I try to stop. Stop thinking. Stop focusing on homework. Stop trying to do a million and one things. I tried to simply focus on not focusing. I closed my eyes and listened to the movie. When the fuzziness disappeared from my eyes it didn’t strain me to keep my eyes open and watch the movie. I continued to try and relax and embrace the movie. Finally my head felt well enough to continue on my homework and finish it up. I slowly turned lights back on, but tried to keep them fairly low. Anyone who has had a migraine can understand. Migraines are painful and debilitating. Traumatic Brain Injuries can lead to Migraines or headaches. Here some more information on the horrible curse of Migraines.