It is frustrating when something in your life changes. Whether its the person who makes your coffee, the friendship that you hoped would turn into something more or the weatherman on tv. Change is hard. Life is hard. There are goods days and bad. I feel like I talk about that alot and am really good at preaching it on my personal good days. However the moment the storm rolls in, its like I hide and duck under the covers from my bad feelings. Its normal to feel hurt or pain when loss comes. If today just isn’t your day thats ok too. Not every day can we climb mountains, pass bills or catch the part we were aiming for. However its how you act during these times. Do you sulk, cry, become mute? For me, I feel like a mess has washed over me. Its during these times that sometimes just a long hot shower can help me to somewhat refocus. I’m not perfect and I will struggle the rest of the day but thats ok. Recently a friend told me, “its ok to be delicate”. I guess I like to put up a strong front, like everything is fine. The truth is, its not. Sometimes I wish things could be different. But, they’re not. On good days its easy to stay focused and faithful but its when I hit the bumps in the road that really slow me down. I may question G-d further, examine myself, tears may fall and all despair may come out at night. But in the evening when I finally go to bed, I often wake up the next morning even a slightest bit better. Its really easy for me to focus my thoughts on something which I don’t have now, even if its something I never had. I needed to write this post for no one. No one, but myself, because I know I needed a reminder that the Best is Yet to Come.
The truth is…if you’re out there and some how stumble upon this, I hope you realize you are not alone. Not everyday can be great. The valleys of days like today are what make the mountain top views that much more beautiful. I know everything will be ok. One day. and for you too!