I know its already February 2014 but I still want to post this. After being exhausted by Israel trip and arriving New Year’s Eve, I think its ok to post this now. So here goes:
I’ve been thinking alot about this year and this trip. I’ve had to say many “see you laters” to friends, co-workers and people I just met. I’ve seen different parts of the world. People living different lives. The diversity but more stern side of life in Germany and the very Jewish, loving and welcoming side of Israel. I’ve seen how much of a bubble my university is and how crazy the world is. I’ve experienced the cut-throat reality in corporate business and the difficulty of studying engineering. Starting a blog was the best way to help me adjust to my constantly changing life and for that I am thankful. I’ve always wanted change but some changes take time and are not easy. Overtime, especially this year I broke out of my comfort zone and its changed my perspective. I’ve opened up more in some ways and closed up in others. I’ve learned from the boys that waltzed into and then walked right out of my life and I’m not bitter about it. I’ve challenged the status quo and made decisions for myself regardless of if there is support or not. In terms of my Judaism, in some ways I’ve done less, but done more with my Jewish friends. The fact that I even have Jewish friends is a first and is change in itself. I’ve listened to conversations in foreign languages I can’t comprehend and yet somehow I can understand whats being discussed. I’ve seen and missed weddings of nearly all my close friends. I’ve tried to eat healthier and loose a few pounds as well as dress cuter and do my hair/makeup. I even dyed a strip of hair blue just because. I’ve done things that are uncertain and scare me; go to Germany and find my way through a crazed labyrinth as well as going zip-lining in Israel. I’ve done things I’ve dreamed of for years like study abroad and go on Birthright and most importantly, go to the Kotel! I have friends and connections who live all over the world, live different lives and yet we can all find things in common. I feel blessed to be alive and this year, I’ve really felt like I’ve started to live. I’m grateful for the memories, the friends, my family, the trips, the experiences and all the learning. I’ve grown and learned so much about myself and who I am. Yet I feel its just the beginning of the rest of my life. This is the starting line and there is no telling the course ahead. One thing I know for certain, everything in life happens for a reason, part of a grand scheme that G-d is orchestrating and it has led me to today with the best ideas and plans in mind.